On Saturday night we had some of Jarno’s friends over for dinner. There were two couples; At & Mar and Je & Ni. At is Jarno’s best friend and is married to Jarno’s sister who for some unknown reason hated me before I even got off the plan in Amsterdam. After years of walking the high road, of being super friendly in the face of her unmasked hostility my legs got tired and I took a stroll on the low road.  Here are some examples of things that were said… Dutch Directness  So the low road meant ignoring her. Not in the Jesus turning thy cheek manner, but by literally pretending she didn’t exist. I quickly heard through the grapevine, “Why is Susan ignoring me?” Uh…. I think this was followed by some self-reflection because all of a sudden she was nice. Every now and then she has a relapse but I can also shoot out some of my simmering resentment, so all in all it’s ok. Her husband, At, is great. There’s no apparent filter between his thoughts and speech but he’s a generous, kind-hearted person and a pleasure to be around. Nic I’ve referred to before with our ‘encounters’ at volleyball. I have say I  am warming up to her hate the self-righteous hypocrite.  

Anyway, bygones. Je is her boyfriend and has often been my lighthouse in the ocean of unfriendliness. He just has a lovely dry sense of humour and is very self-deprecating, both qualities that I warm up to quickly.

The whole point of the dinner was for Jarno to ask At to be his witness (best man) and Je to be the master of ceremonies for our wedding. I whipped together something fab from Jamie Oliver and we sat down to eat. With all the history, I never feel perfectly at ease with the group. I’ve gone from one extreme of trying too hard to please to the other of waiting for them to prove they are worth my time.

I’m still shocked by “Mothers shouldn’t work because staying home is ‘biological’” and other such talk. Actually Je asked me this time if I had a trauma from my Mum having a job. Trust me when I tell you that this progressive reputation of Holland is really a facade for some scarily deep-rooted conservatism. I mean these people are barely 30! Imagine their attitudes in 20 years…. I digress. Jarno asked them both towards the end of dinner and Atso was happy to be best man. Jeen, however, looked like we’d asked him to murder his own mother and finally told us he’d need some time to think about it.

He explained that he was worried our expectations were too high and it would be hard work. This probably stems from their firm consensus that I’m a difficult, weird, over sensitive, perfection loving feminist. It left me sad. After all Je was my lighthouse for a long time and I felt like I watched the light blown out right in front of me.

Dramatic, I know.

On Saturday I went to the “Enough is Enough” protest on the Dam Square in Amsterdam. A few thousand people stood together to protest against the dramatic increase in discrimination, racism and extremism in Holland.

If you’ve been reading my blog before, you’ll know this is something that I’m fanatic about. It’s made me very unpopular at the dinner parties of Jarno’s ultra right wing friends. Come to think of it, we haven’t been invited anywhere in months….

It was a good afternoon with music, dance and of course some very rousing, articulate speakers. It was great to be surrounded by like-minded people. I’m so tired of hearing Dutch people say, “Moroccans are a problem, but I’m not prejudiced,” and, “Holland was better before all the migrants came.” The government is no better having recently deported 26,000 asylum seekers and raising visa prices from 50euro to 1000 euro.

Anyway, I don’t want to rant. I just thought it was weird that I felt more at home around a bunch of 60 year old Muslims than I ever have around ‘native’ Dutch people. Perhaps Allah is calling me??

Note: there are plenty of lovely Dutch people who this doesn’t apply to (e.g. Jarno, Lenny, Andre, Izzy, Bas, Klaas etc)

Peace out.

Something strange happened on Saturday.

I went shopping and didn’t buy anything.

Normally I get a rush as I enter the shop and buy the first cute thing I see. Yet I looked and looked and even after trying a few things on I was left feeling… well… uninterested. Perhaps my 20-year obsession with clothes is coming to an end. Or maybe I’m just turned off by this extreme boho look everywhere?

Earlier that morning Miranda treated me to a massage at SOAP in Amsterdam. It was to say thanks for introducing her to the company. Given that she’s a very easy person to recommend and that I now have someone to chat with all day it seemed a little undeserved. I loved every second though and we floated out of the shop to have a lovely chatty lunch with Colleen.

On Sunday I went to the movies and saw The Island. The reviews were bad but I really liked it. How gorgeous is Scarlett….!

This weekend I went to Barcelona with Izzy. Don’t I sound like a jetsetter? It was a whirlwind trip as we had only two days. We headed straight to the old centre as Izzy so eloquently phrased it, “It has old stuff AND shopping!” This combined with the sunny skies, Gaudi masterpieces, yummy tapas and sangria resulted in great time. Jarno is on a training course this week in Munich so I’m going solo. Some Photos: Prague Barcelona